This is part 3 of a five-part series entitled, “What If My Child Hates His Teacher?”
As big people, we know the importance of a positive connection between our child and his teacher. This series provides ways to foster – and even repair – this relationship.
Our children, by design, are not meant to take direction from nor feel affection towards those who are not part of our inner circle. Why? Well, just think for a moment what that would look like from a safety perspective. Do you really want your child doing the bidding of someone who, by virtue of the fact that they are not part of your inner circle, does not have your child’s truest and deepest best interests at heart?
And do you really want your child nurturing affection for someone that has not established themselves through time and relationship as being a safe addition to your inner circle?
So, get the teacher established as part of your inner circle. Or to put this another way, welcome Mr. Jones into the big-person-village that is helping to grow up your child.
Do this by playing nice in the sandbox. Be sure your child observes you greeting Mr. Jones with a warm smile and welcoming eyes each time you cross paths with him at school.
Relay positive stories about interactions you have had with Mr. Jones.
Do something thoughtful for Mr. Jones like sending in a “you survived the first week” treat or something.
None of this is to win favour with Mr. Jones – so don’t cheapen this idea with that kind of thinking. Rather, it is to install him firmly as part of your village in your child’s eyes. The idea is that with Mr. Jones firmly installed as part of this village, your child will be better able to relax into connection with him.